Category Archives: Daily Fun

Turning Points

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In the typical day of the stay at home mom, you never know what you are going to get. Sometimes it’s best to just step out of the way and let whatever happens happen. It’s days like that when you really get a chance to see your kids for who they are. Today was a rainy afternoon with nothing to do and no play dates. I was a bit nervous how an afternoon in the house would play out, but I tried it anyway. Some afternoons the boys spend the entire time fighting over the same toy, some afternoons they ignore each other, but lately I’ve noticed a change. They are starting to play with each other. Since my sister is one of my best friends, when I see stuff like this it make me happy and weepy at the same time. But instead of cry, I did what I always to – get the camera out!

Hugging in the Hallway

Growing up is a funny thing. It’s gradual at first, then, after a while it becomes second nature. If you aren’t careful you might just miss the change.

Jack Trying to Teach Ben How to Give a Kiss

There is definitely a new maturity in both kids. Jack is nicer and more empathic to Ben, and Ben actually realizes he has a older brother and by the laws of nature he must spend the next 15 or so years of his life chasing after him and looking up to him.

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Summer is here!

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Chicago is in a heat wave right now. Temperatures are in the 90s! When I picked Jack up from school yesterday, I realized they had NO AIR CONDITIONING! Perhaps it’s not a shock to people from this area but as a native born Floridian it’s shocking.

So when I saw temperatures in the 90s again today, I decided I couldn’t bear to send him there to suffer in the heat. Seeing his ruddy little cheeks at pick up yesterday made me feel terrible.

Instead we did the only thing you can do when it’s sunny and hot out – go to a park with a water element.

I jogged them over to Fellger Park, also managing a nice 30 minute run for myself.

We got a lot of dirty looks for bringing these!

It took Jack a while to get into the action but Ben ran right for the water without any fear…

Water!

Finally we ended the afternoon with the best part about a hot summers day, ice cream!

Ice Cream with Connor and Oscar

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Generation Shifts

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I find it hard to believe how much we’ve changed as parents since the last generation raised us.

Everything is different.

They didn’t breast feed. We do.

They slept us on the tummy, we sleep our kids on their backs.

They spanked, we do time outs.

Sometimes when I’ve been a particularly lax parent that day I wonder if that is the day they will remember I screwed them up for life.

It also makes me wonder what the next generation will consider bad parenting that we considered the norm.

As I buy my organic produce, dutifully unplug my cell phone charger when not in use, and drink from my BPA free reusable water bottle at the gym, I know somewhere in the back of my mind it’s doing nothing compared to the harm of all those disposable diapers. I know it’s bad but it’s just soooo much easier. And I know firsthand, I did cloth diapers the first time around. I’m just sure I’m going to get scolded in 30 years for that.

I’m also hoping the ‘cry it out’ method will start to get a bad rep. I’m absolutely hate using it! For Ben’s naps I walk him around in a stroller until he falls asleep instead of listening to the crying. There must be a better way. If only co-sleeping was acceptable in my generation, I’m sure I would have done it. Wouldn’t it be nice to transform one room in your house for a sleep room where everyone slept? Maybe the kids would never wake you up in the middle of the night? Or if they did they would roll over, see their entire family there then rest comfortably? Or maybe it would backfire? They would still wake you up AND all their siblings?

One thing I will say since I’ve become a parent is how much more I appreciate my own parents. How much more understanding I have about the things they did or didn’t do. So maybe, just maybe I have a chance.

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The Third Child

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I always tell people that my husband and I have a very traditional marriage. He works, I stay at home, he carries the heavy furniture, I cook.

But in truth I think that if a couple from the 1950s looked at our marriage, really looked at it, they would beg to differ.

There are small things, like the fact that Adam has a better sense of style than I do, or that I can put a piece of IKEA furniture together a lot more effectively than he can. Certainly the fact that we can openly admit our opposite sex tendencies is a modern thing in itself.

I think the biggest thing that differs in our ‘traditional’ marriage is how many kids we want. He is pushing for 3 and I am still trying to figure out how to juggle 2.

I am so much more inattentive now that I’m a juggler. If my kids are playing in different areas of the park, one can only be watched from a distance. I certainly can’t hear and discipline the name calling, not sharing, and teasing I am sure is happening. But I’m too busy trying to keep my youngest from eating sand, running into a swinging kid, or falling off a play structure.

I am also way less cleanly. With Jack I would dutifully sweep the floors 3 times a day. When Ben came along the floor was lucky to get swept once a day. That old goldfish that I find laying on the floor? It doesn’t get thrown out, it gets eaten. Who has time to get up and throw something out?!

I am also a model of efficiency. A work out for me is also a jog to the park for the kids, while eating their breakfast too!

Ben will be 2 in July. Will I ever feel ready for a third? And if I am, how much more neglectful will I be? Will DCFS find out and take them away?

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Play dates

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Over the years I’ve noticed the play dates us mom arrange for the kids has changed.

When we had our first children we would meet for a couple of hours at one of the mom’s houses and moan about our lack of sleep or the color of our kids poop. We would sit in the same room as the kids and if they so much as brushed past another kid we would ask in a sing song voice for apologies or kindly remind them to be polite. Share sweetness! Take turns honey!

This past Thursday I had my friends Pam and Laurie over. Between the three of us moms we had six kids, five of which were boys.

There was no talk of poop, no sing song voices, no sweetness or honey. There were drinks for the adults upstairs and who knows what downstairs. As long as there was no crying us moms didn’t seem to mind.

Play dates are even better when Doug arrives to help!

It’s not just a play date for the kids anymore. It’s for the adults as well!

I must say, it’s better this way. My father once said, benign neglect can be a good thing when raising kids. The kids have more fun without us constantly reminding them to behave, the adults have more fun without having to constantly remind about behaving. The mess is about the same whether or not I’ve have other people over and after you’ve gotten a good gossip and buzz going bedtime is much less tedious.

The Other Play Date at My House that Day

Afterwards I did find little chocolate hand prints located in sporadic places and there is a new gash in the wall that could have happened that evening but all in all I’m surprised at how little damage was done. I’ve seen much worse in the past, like bathroom flooding and once my entire jewelry box was dumped.

So let me take this opportunity to shout out to Laurie and Pam – you and your kids are welcomed to trash my place while we trash our liver anytime!

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Mother’s Day at the Museum of Science and Industry

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I hope everyone had a great mother’s day.

It seems with each stage in life there are more holidays and gift giving for just being you.

When you were first born, there was your birthday and Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa or whatever end of the year celebration that you celebrated and received gifts.

When you were old enough to date, Valentine’s day was another way to get gifts.

Next came marriage and with it an anniversary.

Then kids and mother’s day.

Now some of these are Hallmark made up holidays but we humans are like lemmings, if one of us are doing it, we all feel we must follow.

Having said that, we had a lovely morning with Adam’s mother and husband at the Museum of Science and Industry this year.

On the steps of the Museum of Science and Industry

Followed by a great long nap for the entire family, which, at this stage in our life is the very definition of a good day.

Stay tuned for a future blog about the Museum of Science and Industry. It’s such an amazing place I think it deserves it’s own blog.

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Self Improvement

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Either I’m evolving or really impressionable.

You would think constantly wanting to change or try things just because others are doing it would mean you are secretly unhappy. But actually it’s the opposite.

In fact a loss of interest in life’s activities, lack of energy, and inability to see the bright side are the very symptoms of unhappiness.

I love my life but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to be able to run longer, lift heavier weights, be skinnier, have better hair, better skin, be a better parent, be a better wife, have more computer skills, read more books, eat healthier, improve my yoga practice and so much more. No matter how great you think you are, there is always room for improvement.

But it does bother me that sometimes I can’t tell if I’m trying to better myself or just be like someone else.

I was over at my friend Hedy’s house the other day. She is into food combining. I knew little about it but was curious. Not curious enough to take the 300+ book that she suggested, especially since the first page I opened had math equations on it. But now I’ve downloaded my food combining chart and I’m already eating differently. She also made me an amazing cocktail. Tequila, Pama pomegranate liqueur, and a splash of fizzy water. The next day I was at Costco buying the ingredients! Evolving or impressionable?

I guess it didn’t matter. Learning about all the new things that day made me happy. It enriched my conversations with others. Maybe it even made me eat a bit healthier. And hey, my husband said the tequila made me quite entertaining.

So I say – people, go ahead and browse the self help aisle without embarrassment, take a new class, unabashedly keep up with the Jones’!

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