Oh yes I did just call myself that.

Monday I accomplished the impossible, or so I thought when I first became a mom of four.

I went to the park by myself.

My helper is out of town and my father, who is here this month to help, had to work.

I knew he couldn’t make all those work phone calls with our naked, screaming kids running around, punching him in the groin and trying to sit on his lap and violently type on his laptop. I had to get out of the house. Otherwise Dad would lose his job. And there is my inheritance to consider, after all.

I tried my hardest to get the kids out before his first call at 10am. But at 9:40 I still had my boob in the second of the twins that needed feeding, both older kids were completely naked, I was still in my jammies and the car was not packed.

By 10:10 we had almost everything piled at the back door, including two twins in their car seat, one screaming. One older kid was dressed, the other one was standing at the door crying as I was screaming that I was going to leave his naked butt if he didn’t get dressed by the time I pulled the car out of the garage.

At 10:15 my father was on the work phone call while carrying twins out to the car. We all got in and as I was backing out Dad and I gave each other a guilty look. I felt guilt for making him work under such oppressive conditions. He felt guilty I was going to the park with four kids on my own.

I now have to eat crow about making fun of Hilary Clinton for saying it takes a village to raise kids. When we just had two I wondered where this village was. Adam and I did all the work unless we were paying someone else for it. That’s not a village, that’s just capitalism.

But today I needed a village. Or a small army. Luckily I happen to travel often with a pack of girlfriends. Today my village people were Cindy, Sara, and Pam. Thanks for all the help!

I’m pleased to say that we didn’t lose anyone, everyone was fed lunch. There was only one potty accident and we all made it home safe. There was even a moment where I was asked to watch another two kids while one of the women when to the bathroom. I must fake that I have it all under control quite well.